Navigating Parent and Caregiver Burnout: My Ever Evolving Dance With Caregiver Resiliency
As a parent to three neurodivergent teenagers, I have experienced significant burnout over the past two years. In December 2022, I realized my usual coping mechanisms were no longer effective. The constant feeling of being overwhelmed, overstimulated, and lacking support not only affected my well-being but also impacted my children's mental health and overall quality of life. To make matters more complex, back in 2018, our children's doctors shared that their father and I were also neurodivergent; we were too overwhelmed to pour into ourselves. Consequently, my spouse and I grappled with burnout in various aspects of our lives, straining all facets of our family life, our relationships and careers.
A turning point came when I attended the JFK Partners program of the Department of Pediatrics of the University of Colorado School of Medicine Caregiver Resiliency Webinar on caregiver burnout, thanks to an email from our families case manger at Rocky Mountain Human Services RMHS . This webinar helped me realize I wasn't a “terrible” mom or a “failure” as a business owner…I was burnt-out. While it has not been easy and our family is constantly readjusting to our new normal the webinar opened my eyes to the importance of supporting parents and caregivers in ways that are actually helpful. I am grateful for the resources we received and now aim to encourage families in Denver and nearby areas in Colorado to access these crucial supports.
Thanks to RMHS, I have access to the following support, which has been a literal lifeline for my family:
Respite
Mental & Behavior Health
Employment & Career programs for teens and young adults
Advocacy & Parent Support for multi-intersectional families with neurodivergent children
Please check out RMHS Resources to search through the list of categories find resources that may be available in your community. If you would like to recommend a community resource to be added to this list, send an email to resources@rmhumanservices.org.
What I Wished I Understood When Our Family Received Our Neurodivergence Diagnosis:
Children with a diagnosis often have parents that have been misdiagnosed and have unhealthy coping mechanisms.
You cannot expect your children to embrace and love themselves for something that you struggle to accept and dislike about yourself.
There is no one-size-fits-all support for neurodivergent individuals or families.
What I Now Understand About Our Individual and Family's Neurodivergence Diagnosis:
Find a therapist or counselor experienced in neurodivergent diagnoses and support, as not all therapists grasp how neurodivergence can significantly impact someone's life without proper support.
Adults diagnosed later in life may require guidance on navigating their diagnosis and dealing with the emotional repercussions of newfound awareness. Grief may arise from finally understanding what you believed was "wrong" with you all along.
Families have various paths to healing and thriving. If a particular therapy, therapist, resource, or supplement loses its effectiveness, be open to letting it go to create space for alternative solutions that may better suit your family.
We appreciate your ongoing interest and support. Let's continue to work towards a future where every individual is valued and supported. Thank you for following me, Hampden Farms and the Colorado Developmental Disabilities Council (CDDC) on LinkedIn. We look forward to thoughtful dialogue and insights.
Be well,
Zephrine
“Remember to take three deep breaths and be well, dear hearts.”
This content was made possible thanks to funding from Colorado Developmental Disability Council CDDC
For the latest updates from CDDC, you can explore their blog.